The Break

OK kids, so it's been a while since I posted here. So the good, the bad and boring the boring of what's been up.

First, work (good). I think I posted few months back about starting a new job at local university up here. My days and hours a kept me busy and after 6 months I had my first review and my bosses are very happy with my work. So happy I'm writing and posting this from work! I also just received 30% off classes BAVG and should be taking a few classes this summer on my job's dime, which should make happy on the job front. On another good note, my stress levels are lowest they have been in over a decade. Which is really really good.

Bad: I'm only half done with that lambretta engine video and over the 3 of the last 4 weekends I rebuilt my vespa rally engine, badly. Ugh. I hate scooters. I ended up dropping it off at Ptown scooters last weekend so Patrick will eventually fix what I can not. Ugh

The Boring: So last weekend I was in Portland for Spring Scoot scooter rally. I was reminded of a few things. Mostly I hate socializing and I'm boring. OK, that makes little to no sense, so maybe I need to write this out a wee bit. So since moving to the bay area, I don't socialize as much as I did when I lived in portland. Even when I lived in Portland, I didn't always socialize that much mainly because of the stress of working 40+ hours a week and trying to do grad school and then on top of that stupid family drama. But since moving here I socialize as a whole, less then I did or ever did, and when I do, I prefer to keep socializing to an 1-3 hours at a time. Then I need to not socialize. I'm not sure of the why or extent of it either. But after more then 3 hours I socially shut down. I don't want to talk, I don't want to get close either. I turn into bah humbug and get off my lawn.

Now I don't hate people or anything like that, but as I've been getting older and socializing less, letting people in and closer to me has become harder and harder for me to do. To the extent that it's completely flat lined my dating life. When I first moved here dating was actually easy and I dated quite a bit. But over the last 2 years I've really curtailed my dating all together. At first I thought it was because I just wasn't meeting anyone I liked. Nope, that wasn't it. Then I thought it was because quality of who I have been meeting, and no, that's obviously not it either. It's me, it's totally me, and it's me. I've slowly withdrawn and stopped caring about stuff like this. I don't and won't let myself get close. Which over the last weekend of a LOT of socializing was apparent. I barely talked at length about anything relevant this weekend. I shared nothing of a personal nature, but I also didn't ask anyone of a personal nature about themselves either. I was unsocial to say the least, even though I was among my people to so to say, I placed myself outside of it and just observed it.

So that's it for the moment. Hopefully I'll have some photos and what little story I have of last weekend to post in week too